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Twisted humor on a brainpower site? I was doing the pages on brain teasers one day, and it occurred to me that most riddles are nothing more than lateral thinking puzzles. Humor, even twisted humor, can be great exercise for the brain, especially for it's creative capacity. So with that excuse in mind, enjoy!
"One night I walked home very late and fell asleep in somebody’s satellite dish. My dreams were showing up on TV’s all over the world." - Steven Wright
- Build a man a fire and he's warm for a night. Set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.
- Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time.
- It is my great hope that someday we'll put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people.
1. Two cannibals were talking over dinner and one admitted to the other, " You know, I just don't like my mother-in-law." His friend sympathized, and told him, "So just eat your vegetables."
2. What did they give the cannibal when he was late for diner? They gave him the cold shoulder..
3. What did the cannibal have on his pizza? Everyone.
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A guy picked up a woman at a bar one night and took her home. On the way, she asked him if he had aids. He told her he didn't. At his house she asked again if he had aids, and he assured her that he didn't. In bed, after they had begun to remove their clothes, she stopped and turned to him.
"You're sure you don't have aids?" she asked.
"Yes, I'm sure," he told her, getting a bit annoyed. She finally stopped talking, and they had sex for hours, doing everything imaginable. Afterwards they were laying there in bed and she snuggled up to him.
"Look," she said, " It's too late now, so you might as well tell me if you have aids."
"I told you I don't have aids," he almost yelled.
"Oh, thank god," she sighed, "I wouldn't want to get that again."
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I woke up one morning and everything in my apartment had been stolen and replaced with an exact